Gold Coast (Australia), welcome to the roller coaster of parenthood, where emotions run wild, tantrums reign supreme and love runs deep.
As children reach childhood and beyond, parents adapt to managing their child's big emotions and disappointments. Parenting terminology has also adapted, with most parents describing their child as "irregular".
But what does it really mean? More than a feeling
Emotional dysregulation refers to the challenges a child faces in expressing emotions and managing emotional reactions in social settings. This may include either suppressing emotions or exaggerating intense emotional reactions Which prevents the child from doing what he or she wants to do.“Regulation” is more than just feeling an emotion. An emotion is a sign, or signal, that can give us important information about ourselves and our priorities, desires, and goals.
An emotionally dysregulated brain is overwhelmed and overloaded (often with disturbing emotions such as frustration, despair, and fear) and is ready to fight, flee, or freeze. Developing Emotional Regulation
Emotion regulation is a skill that develops in childhood and is influenced by factors such as the child's temperament and the emotional environment where they grow up. The stage of emotional development where emotion regulation is a primary function (about 3-5 years) , children begin to explore their surroundings and assert their desires more actively.When their initiatives are thwarted or criticized, it is common for them to experience emotional disarray, sometimes leading to tantrums or anger.
These types of outbursts will subside in a typically developing child as their cognitive abilities become more sophisticated, usually around the age they start school. Express, don't suppress.
Expressing emotions in childhood is important for social and emotional development. This includes the ability to express emotions verbally and through facial expressions and body language. When children struggle with emotional expression, it can manifest in a variety of ways, such as difficulty understanding, emotional outbursts, Flat facial expressions even in charged situations, challenges in forming close relationships, indecision.Many factors can contribute to these issues, including anxiety, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), autism, giftedness, rigidity, and mild and significant trauma experiences.
Common mistakes parents can make are to ignore feelings, or to distract children from how they feel. These strategies do not work and increase feelings of anxiety. In the long term, they fail to equip children with the skills to recognize, express and communicate their emotions, leaving them vulnerable to emotional difficulties in the future.
We need to help children move forward with empathy towards their difficulties rather than shying away from them.Parents need to do this for themselves too.
Caring and Skill ModelingParents are responsible for creating an emotional environment that facilitates the development of emotion regulation skills.
When parents feel distressed they create their own model of emotion regulation. The way they respond to their children's expression of emotions contributes to children understanding and controlling their own emotions. Children should be prepared to respond to their caregivers' emotions, moods, and deal with them because it It is an integral part of existence.In fact, the greatest danger to a child is that their caregiver is not well.
Unsafe, unpredictable, or chaotic home environments rarely allow children the opportunity for healthy emotion expression and regulation. Children who experience abuse have difficulty controlling their emotions, requiring more brain power for tasks that involve managing emotions. This conflict can later lead to more problems with emotions, such as feeling anxious and being alert to potential dangers.
Recognizing and addressing these challenges early is essential to support children's emotional well-being and development.a disorganized mind and body
When children enter "fight or flight" mode, they often struggle to cope or listen to reason. When children experience intense stress, they may respond instinctively without considering strategies or logic. If your child is in fight mode, you may notice crying, kicking, punching, clenching fists or jaws, You may see behaviors like biting, abusing, spitting or screaming.
In flight mode, they may appear restless, have their eyes squinted, display excessive agitation, breathe rapidly, or try to escape.
The shut-down response may resemble fainting or a panic attack.When a child feels threatened, the frontal part of their brain, which is responsible for rational thinking and problem-solving, essentially goes offline.
This happens when the brain's alarm system, the amygdala, sends a false alarm, triggering survival instincts.
In this state, a child may not be able to access higher functions such as reasoning or decision making. Although our tendency may be to fix the problem immediately, it is more effective to be present with your child during these moments. Is. It's about providing support and understanding until they feel safe enough to engage in their high braai tasks again.Reframe your thinking so that you see your child as a problem – not a problem.
Tips for ParentsTake turns at mealtimes to discuss the ups and downs of the day. This is your chance to be curious, accept and label emotions, and model that you too experience a range of emotions, which you need practical skills to deal with and many physical, social-emotional Academic and behavioral evidence has been shown. benefits.
Spending even small amounts of one-on-one time with your child (five minutes a day!) is an investment in your child's emotional well-being.Let them choose the activity, do your best to follow their lead, and try to comment on things they do well, like creative ideas, being firm when things are difficult, and being gentle or kind. Children with Neurodiversity Get advice from parents: Learn about your unique child. Understanding your child's emotions, temperament, and behavior with curiosity can help them develop emotion regulation skills.
When to get help If an emotion disorder is a persistent problem that is hindering your child from feeling happy, calm, or confident — or interfering with learning or important relationships with family members or peers Is - then talk to their GP about connecting with a mental health professional.
Many families have found parenting programs helpful in creating an environment where feelings can be safely expressed and shared.Remember, you can't pour from an empty cup. Parenting requires you to be your best self and put your own needs first to see your child thrive.(th conversation) NSANSA
As children reach childhood and beyond, parents adapt to managing their child's big emotions and disappointments. Parenting terminology has also adapted, with most parents describing their child as "irregular".
But what does it really mean? More than a feeling
Emotional dysregulation refers to the challenges a child faces in expressing emotions and managing emotional reactions in social settings. This may include either suppressing emotions or exaggerating intense emotional reactions Which prevents the child from doing what he or she wants to do.“Regulation” is more than just feeling an emotion. An emotion is a sign, or signal, that can give us important information about ourselves and our priorities, desires, and goals.
An emotionally dysregulated brain is overwhelmed and overloaded (often with disturbing emotions such as frustration, despair, and fear) and is ready to fight, flee, or freeze. Developing Emotional Regulation
Emotion regulation is a skill that develops in childhood and is influenced by factors such as the child's temperament and the emotional environment where they grow up. The stage of emotional development where emotion regulation is a primary function (about 3-5 years) , children begin to explore their surroundings and assert their desires more actively.When their initiatives are thwarted or criticized, it is common for them to experience emotional disarray, sometimes leading to tantrums or anger.
These types of outbursts will subside in a typically developing child as their cognitive abilities become more sophisticated, usually around the age they start school. Express, don't suppress.
Expressing emotions in childhood is important for social and emotional development. This includes the ability to express emotions verbally and through facial expressions and body language. When children struggle with emotional expression, it can manifest in a variety of ways, such as difficulty understanding, emotional outbursts, Flat facial expressions even in charged situations, challenges in forming close relationships, indecision.Many factors can contribute to these issues, including anxiety, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), autism, giftedness, rigidity, and mild and significant trauma experiences.
Common mistakes parents can make are to ignore feelings, or to distract children from how they feel. These strategies do not work and increase feelings of anxiety. In the long term, they fail to equip children with the skills to recognize, express and communicate their emotions, leaving them vulnerable to emotional difficulties in the future.
We need to help children move forward with empathy towards their difficulties rather than shying away from them.Parents need to do this for themselves too.
Caring and Skill ModelingParents are responsible for creating an emotional environment that facilitates the development of emotion regulation skills.
When parents feel distressed they create their own model of emotion regulation. The way they respond to their children's expression of emotions contributes to children understanding and controlling their own emotions. Children should be prepared to respond to their caregivers' emotions, moods, and deal with them because it It is an integral part of existence.In fact, the greatest danger to a child is that their caregiver is not well.
Unsafe, unpredictable, or chaotic home environments rarely allow children the opportunity for healthy emotion expression and regulation. Children who experience abuse have difficulty controlling their emotions, requiring more brain power for tasks that involve managing emotions. This conflict can later lead to more problems with emotions, such as feeling anxious and being alert to potential dangers.
Recognizing and addressing these challenges early is essential to support children's emotional well-being and development.a disorganized mind and body
When children enter "fight or flight" mode, they often struggle to cope or listen to reason. When children experience intense stress, they may respond instinctively without considering strategies or logic. If your child is in fight mode, you may notice crying, kicking, punching, clenching fists or jaws, You may see behaviors like biting, abusing, spitting or screaming.
In flight mode, they may appear restless, have their eyes squinted, display excessive agitation, breathe rapidly, or try to escape.
The shut-down response may resemble fainting or a panic attack.When a child feels threatened, the frontal part of their brain, which is responsible for rational thinking and problem-solving, essentially goes offline.
This happens when the brain's alarm system, the amygdala, sends a false alarm, triggering survival instincts.
In this state, a child may not be able to access higher functions such as reasoning or decision making. Although our tendency may be to fix the problem immediately, it is more effective to be present with your child during these moments. Is. It's about providing support and understanding until they feel safe enough to engage in their high braai tasks again.Reframe your thinking so that you see your child as a problem – not a problem.
Tips for ParentsTake turns at mealtimes to discuss the ups and downs of the day. This is your chance to be curious, accept and label emotions, and model that you too experience a range of emotions, which you need practical skills to deal with and many physical, social-emotional Academic and behavioral evidence has been shown. benefits.
Spending even small amounts of one-on-one time with your child (five minutes a day!) is an investment in your child's emotional well-being.Let them choose the activity, do your best to follow their lead, and try to comment on things they do well, like creative ideas, being firm when things are difficult, and being gentle or kind. Children with Neurodiversity Get advice from parents: Learn about your unique child. Understanding your child's emotions, temperament, and behavior with curiosity can help them develop emotion regulation skills.
When to get help If an emotion disorder is a persistent problem that is hindering your child from feeling happy, calm, or confident — or interfering with learning or important relationships with family members or peers Is - then talk to their GP about connecting with a mental health professional.
Many families have found parenting programs helpful in creating an environment where feelings can be safely expressed and shared.Remember, you can't pour from an empty cup. Parenting requires you to be your best self and put your own needs first to see your child thrive.(th conversation) NSANSA
